Sotd: let’s go – Chicago cubs. Probably isn’t a real song but whatever.
The last few days have been what I would describe as progressive overload. That is every night I go to bed exhausted after watching way too much YouTube and then the next morning feel a little tired then continue this cycle on and on until eventually I die of exhaustion.
As Jake Paul so succinctly puts it “it’s everyday bro” and eh yeah kinda. Despite the fact there isn’t really much to do in terms of school stuff there’s still tonnes of stuff to do. A quick search brings up two Cambridge summer schools- both of which I’m away for but the idea is there is lots I could be doing. We got hit by a biology olympiad yesterday that despite being semi inconsequential if you performed well there was an opportunity to join the olympiad training camp which would be sick.
So the idea is that for another week running im pissed at myself for doing nothing.
Finished s5 today which is wildin because that’s senior school almost over.
Sotd: almost famous – geazy
I’ve got a few websites that I go on whenever I don’t really have anything to do. Primer magazine, Gizmodo, tech radar and art of manliness. For some reason I always feel weird typing that, perhaps I’m ashamed that you need help to be manly and then the social justice warriors proclaim that okay that we aren’t the paragons of masculinity we were in the past and that in the future the world should be ruled by effeminite non binary females.
After that long digression the post is about this guy I read about on there, Walter or wilbert or probably nothing like that and his workout. Basically he reached the nfl just doing press ups, pullups, crunches bodyweight squats and hill sprints but this isn’t like small numbers he was doing thousands of each every day. I kept thinking about how cool that was, how cool it would be to do that. That’s something you can say when it’s someone who takes steroids and has access to a 24/7 gym but when the guy only does bodyweight stuff you don’t really have an excuse.
So I think this is me just committing to do that stuff whenever I have free time because it’s a good way to use it and frankly even if I don’t get to nfl standard it’s just useful. That also just translates into more of an ability to take action, do things you don’t want to do and shut out the thinking mind.
Sotd: good liquor – nick lopez haven’t listened to the one in the while and s/o to Marissa for killing it in that mumble.
I’m not sure what to write about today, maybe about just doing it all. I think I’ve realised my major gripe with all this higher education is the fact I have to choose, that I have to actually just sit down pick one and be happy with that for at least 4 years. I don’t think that appeals to me, I like being able to take the best aspects from each and do that. Just drawing and designing stuff is as fun as understanding random theories.
One of my colleagues who I’m convinced is a dumbass pretty much summed it up when he professed how ridiculous it was that we’re meant to decide this early on. I know you can change after a few years but still that is just moving from one silo to another.
I just like the old way, maybe I was born a few centuaries too late but I like the idea of being a polymath, a lawyer, engineer, scientist and mathematician. University provided tools for one to be able to think, use rhetoric and apply our knowledge and beyond that not much else. That’s what the vice chancellor of Oxford mentioned, her desire to see university creating critical thinkers who could apply that to every facet of their life – not departmentalised drones who will lose their jobs when the robots come. (a bastardisation of her point that makes it sound like a dystopian terminator endgame)
sotd: polite – clay borrell.
Opening up with a little carphone anecdote because at this rate my life is about to be consumed by all things carphone and honestly that’s not a fun thing – I enjoy it and all but realise that I will have to jump off that ship eventually or be sucked into a sales job for the rest of my life.
Last night in a semi-drunken stupor I professed my fear of going to work today, because today was the day I returned to the toll, working again with the manager that hired me in the first place. So yeah that was kinda weighing on my mind.
It probably didn’t help that I drank more than I’ve ever done (which wasn’t exactly a huge feat) but yeah I finally found out what drunk is, it’s amusing, like that time when I was actually sleep deprived, vision was all funny and I just couldn’t think straight, called a taxi which took a little too long and just slurred out the directions once we almost got there. I was still kinda cogent, couldn’t type for shit.
Then when we got back bunked out, convinced I was going to throw up, then people started snoring so I took the sofa bed, but we hadn’t pulled it out fully so it was this tiny little square that was slanted so I tried sleeping on a slope that could barely fit me curled up. The watch says I got 3 hours sleep which is far from optimum but dunno at work I was still buzzed, one thing I’ve realised is just how effortless it’s become now. I can just slip into the salesman, even sleepdeprived and brain getting bathed in toxins I managed to pull off 4 subs, whilst the other guy who had been with the company full time for years did 1. I think that chat my boss had with me about the reason that he hired me was because I wrote “potential to be the greatest salesman ever” really hit home, I’m excited for where this is going.
Sotd: almost famous – geazy.
With this whole having an awful memory thing it is worrying that the most basic things seem to be false or true. Dreams I’ve had the night before become entangled with memories of the day before and frankly I can’t really tell which was which. Perhaps its some problems that cropped up when I was born or maybe it’s just the standard human condition to confuse ones own memories.
It occurs to me as I spent a good hour or two watching and playing vain yesterday that I wouldn’t ever remember it. That despite joy I had in watching armada systematically dismantle the other teams before finally being beat by attrition I would forget it all within a week. The only lasting memories, the only things I would remember and the things I’ve built and done, those are forever immortalized within my mind.
So the only real way to get a life of contentment of what I’ve done is to produce results, not consumption because you forget that after a few minutes. But the results are permanent and always there.
Sotd: all that talk – mike stud
The title stands for so I got bit on the foot by a bee because this morning as I prepared to let loose holy hell on my toilet at home I kinda waddled down into position, wiggled my foot into position and then it hit me. This weird numbing sensation that kinda felt like oh shit here comes the stroke.
But then again it turns out I just stood in a dead bee and I had a sting under my foot which is more annoying than anything that I’d be standing all day with a fuck off bite on my foot. But maybe some wim God training or maybe just because it was kinda dead it was fine after a minute or two. Off to watch mobile masters now
sotd: candy paint – post malone. Just because “you don’t want war” is the greatest line of all time in my opinion. Maybe it’s too much tv where people compare themselves to being “the war” or bringing it, the allusions to typhoons or elemental things greater than human is something I’ve always thought is just awe-inspiring.
I wrote a post probably a year ago entitled digging wells, it all sprung from a little Tai Lopez quote about digging wells (yeah sorry, there was a point in my life when I actually found Tai amusing and worth watching). The whole quote went something like “dig a well before you need it (complex I know) but the whole idea was to start preparations for things far before you really needed it. One doesn’t get that ibiza beach body a week before they leave but rather must shape it over months. What helped me do well in exams wasn’t that I crammed well or I learn better but because I started to dig that well long before anyone else even thought about it.
That foresight is something I seem to have lost, this ability to force myself to do something when I can’t see any reward in sight, to “grind in the dark” with no real goal in sight, that’s why no one does it. I think I’ve lost the optimism lately, or maybe lost the goal, divided as I am about what to do upon leaving school I’m kinda torn between what to do.
Before the prize was always – well – winning prizes. Now it kinda is but not really, theres entrance exams to schools i might want to go to, innumerable gap year placements that I might be allowed to go to and so on.
Frankly I’m just being a little bitch, need to bite the bullet and get back at it. If I’m not back by next thursday I think we’re gonna have to go back to the days where Kevin tried to bend his will in order to actually do things.