I was going to write this post about lifestyles and momentary goals. I’d have written something about how some people do things just to achieve goals and then give up but some people do things because they see it as a lifestyle. Take music for example, I never really saw music as a lifestyle, after grade 8 I just about dropped it and haven’t really touched a piano since, I still can’t manage to make playing violin a habit, I can’t seem to pick it up for extended periods of time. For a while revision was a lifestyle for me, I literally became studying for a period of time. I could’ve dreamed of my biology notes, I would plan what I could do and terrifyingly I was eager to jump into it. Actually I suppose it was more of a goal, revising for my big test, I didn’t really live it, more I was really into a single goal that I had to achieve, after that I’ve been adamant to start again.
I wasn’t really going to write about it today but I stumbled onto a nice little vein of gold there so I thought I’d ride it out.
Today’s will be on fully existing in the moment and choosing how to feel. There’s that thing were you think of all these witty things you could’ve said after the fact, things that would’ve caused even more impact, perfect wordings and superb comedy, but the time has passed and you’ll never be able to use those jewels again. My dream would be able to do those in real time, to effortlessly see the conversational threads and pluck upon any one’s that I chose, to perfectly capture a tenor and choose words succinctly and effortlessly, that would be dope. There’s periods when I can feel it, bits of flow where it just instantly comes out. For some reason I seem to get it the most whenever I’m talking to strangers in the presence of friends. I cracked a few of the biggest lines of the decade on this Greggs waitress whilst asking for four spoons, I didn’t get the spoons but the sentiment stood, I flowed through it all, conversational jiu jitsu, leaving a slightly amused but pissed off middle aged woman.