Sotd: white iverson- post malone. I think this is the song that got me into what I think is the white hiphop genre. White iverson came onto my YouTube mix one day and from there I was catapulted into this strange world of rich middle class white people rapping about the hardships of their life and I quite liked it so I journeyed further down that rabbithole.
Neb’s always been the kid to ask the real big questions in life. In the middle of biology as he foundered and tried his hardest not to fail the course he dreamily remarks “imagine if we could save up oxygen and use it later on” I shake my head, laugh and get told off by my teacher for talking. I’m not sure why I laughed at him, it’s actually quite a cool idea but I didn’t even want to entertain the idea. I used to do it a lot, imagine what life would be like if I was different, whiter, cooler, taller, with a better memory, eyesight etc but then I realised one day that really it was pointless. Honestly it was a little nihilistic but one day I just decided the only way I could change would be to die and be reincarnated and I’m pretty sure reincarnation doesn’t happen so there was no way to change these things. I’m too live and die as I am and I can only change what is in my control and thinking about the other possibilities is just a waste of my own time and energy.
Nihilism done let’s talk about being free from outcome. Red beard has finally come out of his depressive stint and is now posting stupid good hour long videos almost every week. One was about being engaged but not attached to the outcome, taking things seriously but not really giving a fuck about what happens. I don’t actually have much to write about it now but I’ll end with this, he did a video asking people about their plans for the future. One guy gets up and says he wants to hustle hard for years which is just boring mainstream things every Tom dick and harry says but he adds in saying he’ll have fun working because he bloody loves it. He has fun whilst he works, not searching for some weird from of happiness in the future but rather being able to mess around whilst he’s working hard and I think that’s what I want to be able to do, to have more fun doing what people consider mundane than they do when they’re “having fun”.