College Review

Sotd: go flex – post Malone. Only the most fire track of all time, well joking with no option which has also been on repeat 24/7 

So this is the Cambridge review. 

First of all there doesn’t really seem to be that much evidence of rich English dicks. Looking at this list of attributes of colleges for some reason I was wanting to go to one with more state school kids, trying to avoid private school wankers obviously forgetting that I, myself, am a private school wanker. 

But no everyone seems lovely, the ones I talked to were great people, the open day tour guides were champs and in all honesty it’s less legacy kids and more awkward kids who are more concerned about how to make friends than riding the polo ponies on daddy’s plantation. 

Of course there were the wankers at st John’s and kings who were just awful people like this guy who almost refused to let us in because we hadnt registered at a front desk. 

It seems chill to be honest, they expect around 48 hours of work a week total which really isn’t even that much especially if you like what you’re learning, I mean with 7 hours of sleep that still gives you 8 hours to fuck around with every day. (the maths isn’t quite right but whatever).

As for actually getting in, I like my chances. Perhaps its just hubris now because I’ve had friends who were academically pretty good but still somehow didn’t get in – maybe there is some special szechuan sauce to it all but who knows maybe they just weren’t as good as I reverentially thought they were. 

I think my chances are pretty good, still a little confused about how they weight each part of the application and it worries me a little that they don’t care how autistic you are since I’ve spent a fair bit of time trying to be less of an autist than I used to be (pretty amazed autist wasn’t autocorrected) but am a little scared I’ll get shafted by my teachers. 

St cats seems like the one, didn’t really spend that much time with them but after hearing more about it it seems lovely, that or peterhouse opposite. Then again there’s always Trinity but to be honest that seems a little too ritualistic and pompous – and the other end of the scale is Churchill where everyone is lovely especially that girl who swapped my Scottish tenner for an English one and used her sage knowledge to instruct me on how to get a dominoes as room service. 

Gonna have to get some alpha sights and some ckeeky merchants done but yeah happy, if a little tired on my three hours of sleep but content. 

I do wonder if the reason I’m procrastinating this whole thing is because of the gap year program that I might want to just take instead of final year a chance to do something I’m truly passionate about – and genuinely passionate – not just money passionate about which would me no to Cambridge but also means I wouldn’t have to go through the tedium of sixth year