Dennis Playing

Sotd: lsd – asap rocky. 

So last year I had that talk with my friend about what we’d achieved in the year, and this year I’d say I’ve done more than ever before and I’m happy with how it’s going, but one thing is obvious, I’m still just the same person. 

Despite it all and all the prose I can write I’m still fraught with the same beliefs, feelings, convictions and hinderances. Two explanations derive from this: either its all been surface level and I haven’t changed fundamentally, or that I have changed but teenage angst is universal and inescapable. 

I quite like having the frustrations I have being a teenager, it is the reason I actually do anything because I’m frustrated by my predicament. I’m annoyed that I can’t just hop on a flight anywhere in the world, buy a new phone on an impulse, laugh whenever I want or just do what I want to do with my time. 

Perhaps I’m not happy with how nothing’s really changed, but that’s essential. Imagine if everything was fixed, if I had no more struggles or worries left in the world – what I would do with myself. 

It’s nice to just have these stressors to push on your buttons and force you to evolve – the point isn’t happiness 24/7 but contentness and that’s an important distinction I keep forgetting

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